Life, it doesn’t get much better, nor does the incredibly positive impact this is having on my mental health.
I’m back again, or should that be back again again or again again again again. Ok so i’ll be the first to admit that i’m a tad inconsistent when it comes to posting on here. Not intentionally of course, it’s just that sometimes life gets in the way & before you know it months have passed & then there’s that moment of, oh yeah I have a blog I should really get back to that.
So here I am, living in a new city, Perth. Which has turned out to quite possibly be the most significant life changing move that I have ever made.
And it’s a move I have wanted to make for over 3 years, way back before I moved to Melbourne with the guy who broke my heart. Back before it felt like my entire life was crashing down around me & it took every ounce of resolve to get out of bed every morning.
And the road to get here may have had more arduous twists & turns than I had anticipated, but boy am I glad I have finally arrived, in more ways than one.
You will have to forgive me for the lack of posts lately.
Somewhere in the last couple of weeks I seem to have lost my way & ended up in some dark back alley where thinking about everything that has gone wrong in my life in the last 6 months are the only allowable thoughts & any scrap of happiness that may have squeezed it’s way in is subsequently spat back out again.
I thought I had reached rock bottom awhile back, turns out what I thought was rock bottom was actually clay & there was a whole sub-level of solid rock hidden beneath, who knew.
But alas it seems I have finally reached the impenetratable rock. Unfortunately I reached it last Wednesday night at dinner with friends, where out of nowhere I literally could not hold back the tears any longer. I mean really how classy am I, out for a lovely dinner, surrounded by random strangers & there I was wiping tears away with a paper napkin.
And i’m not sure where i’m going from here, I guess that’s the thing with hitting rock bottom, you kinda only have two options, sit there for awhile & wallow in your own self misery or start climbing back up, it’s deciding which option to choose that seems the impossibly hard part.
It’s crazy how in 6 short months I have gone from the happiest, albit kinda stressed, girl in the world to a shadow of my former self. When your own mother feels helpless & is worried sick because you have “lost your sparkle” you truly know that all is not well.